On Monday a coaching client mentioned feeling inadequate to put herself in front of high-end clientele . The next day I heard the same fear articulated by another woman I was coaching who also had that “less than” thing going on. Then, over lunch with a colleague yesterday same story again.
So, what started as an “hmmmm” on Monday, took on trend status Tuesday and proved to be an epidemic by Thursday. Definitely a blog topic for today!
I’m traveling to Florida next week to be with good friends and have also scheduled an appointment while I’m down there to meet with the President of an acclaimed art college to offer a collaborative event. My gremlins are SCREAMING: “Why would he be interested in YOU?” “He has millions of alums who can do what you do in high heels and backwards.” “What could you possibly offer that he doesn’t already have enough of?”
Do you need me to share more to qualify for this sorority? I didn’t think so…
Fortunately, I participate in a spiritual fellowship every Friday morning and heard just what I needed today to address this issue: the fear that lies beneath our desires.
I believe that my intuitive hit to contact this gentleman, based on a quote of his I read in the NYTimes awhile back, was the spark of God in me. And that my gremlins represent FEAR and are combated only by action.
What’s on the other side of this impostor/less-than/fear-of-success syndrome is faith, success and the unknown. It used to be more comfortable for me (us) to wallow in the familiar, icky as it may be. I can’t do that any more.
The way I get beyond my saboteurs, head games and paralysis is to name it and claim it, to ask for help and to do the next right thing. I pick up the phone, describe what’s going on to a caring friend, and describe the action I’m going to take on my behalf. It has worked every time I’ve done this and is the underpinning for my success to date.
The fear doesn’t go away. I keep doing scarier and cooler things in my business. But the muscle I’m flexing to overcome the fear is growing stronger every time I use it.